This is me "not stopping."

Drum Solo!

Boom, Boom, Boom!

Crash....

"I will not stop this race,
Until I see heavens gates.
I will not stop this race,
Until I see you face to face."

To look back, and to look at today, then to look forward. This is what it means to be human. The ability to look. I find myself looking back at the first moment those words came into my mouth, and sprung forth into sounds, (than noise), to today in which I taught a family the chords, to the future, where I will be able to "stop."

again.

"I will not stop this race,
Until I see heavens gates.
I will not stop this race,
Until I see you face to face."

To endure. This is what it means to be me. To keep going, no matter how hard, how tough, how unpleasant, how ill, how painful it becomes. This has been a core theme within my life. To endure. To not stop. To always continue. To return to the place of Love.

Stop!

Oh, Whoa oh oh. Ooh oh oh. Oh.

I'm sure you've never felt this way.

Change seriously makes you doubt your own abilities. It makes you think your being weeded out, given up on, and insecure. Change gives you the opportunity to devalue your own talents, skills, and professions.

When in all reality, I am exactly who I've been all along. Simply a little more honest about it. I just have to work a little more harder. Its not like I'm owed that role or expected to fill it. I'm just really in desire for it. Really passionate for it.


Jesus is still God, and since that's all that matters, I'm going to move forward, without all these "I could have's" or "I should have's."

Its just an Obession. Nothing more.

"Leave unsaid unspoken
Eyes wide shut unopened
You and me will
Always be
Between the lines"

The interesting thing about life is there will always be a huge concern with whether we are right, but more so, whether He/She is wrong.

I think we've all lived within this mode of being for way too long. I mean, who cares if he said that, or she did this, or if we're right and their wrong. 20 years from now, it won't matter, and if it does, you've simply wasted a good 20 years of life to live.

No matter how many details you remember from that one night, or how many lines you remember from that one scene way back when, yesterday isn't coming back. But tomorrow's on its way. To live is to Determine Tomorrow's too important to waste precious thought on yesterday. To live freely is to determine Today is too relevant for Tomorrow's hopes.

To live honestly is to ensure that Yesterday stay's in Yesterday, and doesn't leak into today or tomorrow.

This silly relationship we have with these three things. Yesterday is like that innocent sin. Nothing too big for damnation into Hell. Today is that stranger that smiles at you, but your too uncomfortable to smile back. Its just Apathy and Indifference. Tomorrow is our distant friendship. Our love that is too far a distance to love, so we just let go. Its just a dead hope. No biggie.

This is the attitude we've taken as humans. Just the same thing over and over. Nothing new under the sun. So why try?










I'm sorry, I'm going to go dream, and hope, and love. If you have a problem with that, feel free to comment below, but rest assured, I probably won't read it. I'm too busy living life. =]

Another Intuitive Altruism

iHope
iLove
iDream
iWish
iDesire
iPray
iPlay
iLaugh
iCreate
iFilm
iMentor
iLearn
iWalk
iSeek
iRun
iErr
iFall
iStand
iForgive
iRush
iProcrastinate
iAccomplish
iAchieve
i before e, accept after C
iSee
iHurt
iSuffer
iContinue
iEndure
iShare
iKeep
iRunAway
iWalkAway
iText
iTalk
iGossip
iSin
iRepent
i am His.



What's your "i"?

Blessed are these Hands

If I had to dwindle my entire life into a single declaration of truth, a universal altruism for all of man to learn from, it would be this:

Life is nothing more than the opportunity to dream, hope, love, and change. To live is the largest responsibility that most of humanity has yet to accomplish. To live passionately in pursuit of something greater than myself, the people around me, and the reality that has been given to me. To be able to relate to yourself, understand yourself, and know yourself.

It is this absence of true Identity that we allow the Devil the single foothold required to bring us hell. It is with our permission that the Enemy pursues us, discovers us, and welcomes us to Hell.

Bear fruit, Love your neighbor, Love your neighbor's neighbor, and, above all, Love your Enemy. To be in agreement with the one who hurt you, made you suffer, bore pain across your heart, and was the spawn of all brokenness in your life: That is how we win this war.





Seriously, Just forgive him. Just forgive her. Get over it and move on.

Can we call it Love?

Continual growth, this form of suffering.
Just needing to let it out. Just needing to allow it
its freedom.

Fire burning, tearing me up inside. I cannot hold it back.
I cannot resist its mighty temptation.
Can we call it Love?

We can.

=]

The Memoirs I wish I Could Write Page 198

closing, this has been the hardest chapter to consider and write. To signify the end, be reassured that I am completely satisfied with the outcome. No better argument could have been made than this 199 page syllogism for a life transformed from trembling, shaking, ill-informed, misidentified into free, hopeful, and true. I have not failed in my attempt to allow you a peek into a life filled with love abounding in limitations, exceptional boundaries and unnecessary feelings of angst.

But I have failed.

I have fallen.

I have taken the road often travelled.

And yet, I am an individual with strength surpassing any hint of reasonable understanding. Yes, with the inclusion of Jane, Josh, Eric, and Danielle, I have been lost, confused, placed in utter chaos. But, I rise. I Live. I Love. I still Love.

It is often said that the courageous only die once, compared to the coward whose death is countless. Only the coward dies once. It takes a man of strong conviction to die daily, to kill his "self" and continue the journey of a burdened cross.

God is my all. Without my successful ability to fail, without the many mistakes and valleys I've had to climb out of, He would simply be another stranger, a lonely man on the bench of despair, and I would be left empty in my loneliness.

My scarlet days are over. I live on to live freely. No one ever lives unless they die first. I guess this was what Complete, full resignation meant. Without the loss of Jane and Josh I would have never loved Eric and Danielle.

But more so, I would have never Loved.

And as always, to say good-bye to a level of consistency, a focal project, a

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